Humor: The Ant and The Grasshopper

Read this on the Web at http://media.patriotpost.us/humor/2012/04-03.html

The Ant and The Grasshopper TRADITIONAL VERSION: The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold. MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself! MODERN VERSION: The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving. CBS, NBC, ABC and CNN show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so? Kermit the Frog appears on MSNBC with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing, "It's Not Easy Being Green." Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film the group singing, "We shall overcome." Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake. Democrat leaders, in every media outlet they can find, exclaim that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper and call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share. Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the summer! The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government. Hillary Clinton gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of federal judges that Barack Obama appointed from a list of single-parent welfare recipients. The ant loses the case. The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it. The ant has disappeared in the snow. The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood. MORAL OF THE STORY: Be careful how you vote in 2012. To subscribe to Patriot Humor, click here. To submit humor items for our consideration, email us at humor@patriotpost.us CLICK HERE FOR Patriot Headline Report For News That Matters Most -- Around the Clock We value your time. As a service to you, our editorial team evaluates hundreds of reputable news sources each day for headlines that are relevant to Essential Liberty – the restoration of constitutional limits on government and the judiciary, and the promotion of free enterprise, national defense and traditional American values. We post links to the most notable news 24 hours a day. Skip the Drudgery of wading through celebrity reports and other non-news. –Mark Alexander, Executive Editor CLICK HERE FOR The Right Opinion The Web's Best Columnists Our editorial team has evaluated and selected these nationally syndicated columnists who write about subjects that are relevant to our mission – the advancement of Liberty. While we don't agree with every position taken, we find these authors best reflect good Right Thinking. We post these essays – without advertising or frills – by 0800 ET each day. –Mark Alexander, Executive Editor Follow The Patriot Post:                You have received this email because you are subscribed to Patriot Humor, a service of The Patriot Post. To subscribe to Patriot Humor and The Patriot Post, link to http://patriotpost.us/subscribe/. To manage your subscription or to unsubscribe, link to http://patriotpost.us/manage/ and log in with your email address.